No Con Se Ken Says

At first glance, the title of this blog may appear to be a foreign language.  It isn't.  Instead, it is the phonetic breakdown of how my Little Man says the phrase "No consequences."

The most recent use of this phrase was last night.  Jake and I are trying to teach Little Man that he needs to listen to what Mom and Dad say and obey quickly.  Our teaching this principle is feeling even more urgent since we have recently welcomed a Baby Sister to our family and she of necessity spends a (large) portion of the day not in our arms--leaving her exposed to the energetic and speedy actions of her overly loving Big Brother.

Last night, we were preparing to have our family prayer and had asked several times for Little Man to join us, but he kept running away.  We  have found that if we state a consequence for disobedience, he will do as we have requested.  Unfortunately, Little Man is occasionally SLOW to obey even with the stated consequence.  Perhaps it was my state of exhaustion that caused me to lose my patience, but there came a point that I started counting to 3 (which almost always elicits the desired response in a rapid fashion).  Tragically (yes, tragically) last night I actually made it to 3 :(.  

The tragic consequence for Mom making it all the way to 3 without Little Man sitting down for prayer was that he didn't get his sippy cup of milk while going to bed.

Upon hearing that he would no longer be able to have his "Sippy Big Milk" he rushed over to where we were kneeling and started crying, "Babes pray with Dad! Get Sippy Big Milk! Peas Peas Peas (Please)" We reminded him that not getting milk was the consequence for not listening to Mom.  This caused him to break out with a string of "No Con Se Ken Says!"

These "No Con Se Ken Says!" moments have taught me something that I never supposed as a child: Enforcing consequences is as hard or harder for parents than receiving them for children.  Not allowing my Little Man to have his "sippy big milk" last night made my evening much more difficult not only because I had to listen to him begging for milk (saying please over and over for it no less) and crying, but because I knew that giving him the milk would likely result in him falling asleep quickly and allow me to finish up some other responsibilities I needed to attend to.

But I did not give him the milk.  I couldn't because as a Mom, it is my responsibility to teach my child correct principles.  As a Mom, I need to teach my Little Man and Baby Sister to trust that what I say will happen, will happen.

I don't need them to know this because I am their Mom and want them to obey me, but because the home is the first place (and increasingly the ONLY place) that they can learn there are consequences for their actions. Despite what the government may do remove the hard consequences of unwise choices, the Lord has not removed them.

I want my children to know that they must obey the Lord to receive the blessings He so wants to give them.   I want them to know that they can not reach the judgement bar after a disobedient life and cry "No consequences!" and receive the same blessings as the obedient and faithful.  I want them to trust that God will do as He says He will, and the promised consequences, good and bad, will be waiting for them after their choices.  I am sure it is hard for our Heavenly Father to have to with hold those blessings from us, much like it was hard for me to not allow Little Man to have his milk, but He will withhold them if we have disregarded His Laws.

And I feel it is my role to teach my children this principle by letting them experience it in a small degree at home---so that they can develop the discipline to do it with a Heavenly Parent they can not see.  So, I'm sorry my Little Ones....there will be "Con Se Ken Says"in our home.